On Revelation

I think, that in order to maintain a life and be a generally together person, let alone a beguiling and intriguing one, you have to express yourself somewhere. More than an outlet, a maintenance. Self-promotion. To be strong, confident outwardly, I have to be soft, showcase my softness, somewhere.

And I am soft here.

Encantada is gentle. It’s a closing my eyes and holding on. Its a testing of boundries and limits. It’s a distraction. Encantada is distract-ed. Overly aware and conscious. Completely projected. Misguided. Ravenous. It’s because I’ve stayed in this one place, this soft and gentle one, for so long now.

It’s now time; been time for awhile now.

Interesting.

Has changed so many things. Has shown me and brought me so many things. Has potential. It’s the little boat tossing around.

Months ago, back when others were helping me and pushing me to the start one, I chose the name to just establish something out there. It came to me because I like the linguistics, the sound. The vowel repition. I like saying it. And yes, it translates to “enchanted”, but I chose it for one of it’s cultural connotations instead of it’s translation. If you say it when you’re meeting someone, it means that you’re blown away.

So much to say, so much to tell you

I just can’t right now, seeing as I’m in the orifice, dangerously backed up from having spent all day yesterday in bed. I’d call it a self-indulgent day, but quite frankly I can’t remember it. I was recovering, but not from having hurt myself. I can barely remember this past week to be quite honest.

But I have so much to say. There’s a feeling – no, there’s more than a feeling – going around, ravenously consuming me, that is positively charged, frantically energized within a small, small space, producing friction. Producing highly charged friction. Now just where will it’s outlet be…. ?

Freewheeling ‘bloggers’ are rewriting rules of journalism

Just a few years ago, blogs were relatively rare. Now there are millions. They’re devoted to every topic imaginable, from knitting to dating to homelessness. But those who have had the most impact write about politics. Bloggers were in large part responsible for a change of leadership in the Senate last year.

A sampling of political blogs:

Kausfiles.com: Mickey Kaus, 52, worked at the New Republic and Newsweek before starting one of the first political blogs in 1999.

Infinite time, for a monkey with a typewriter,
probably
means
Never

So I gotta get started.

A Little Bit Sweeter, A Little Bit Deadlier

Saying the words doesn’t mean – ever – that I’m referring only to what I post under a subject. It’s not The All. Saying “so much introspection” is a reference to now, to right now – these minutes, these days. Granted, introspection is Always. But right now, it’s every cell, every minute, every breath, never ceasing, always breathing, part of my being awake each day.

Today was a literal shocker. So much happened today. So much surprised me. It was good; I wasn’t prepared for any of it and it got me in the soft underbelly, under the radar, out of my view. I received a beautiful compliment from a stranger in another language, thousands of miles away. I received an email from an estranged friend after six years of no contact. hmmm. I learned that someone I care about is doing alright these days. I learned that what I really want will not come easy.

Whatever. I’m embarrassed of Encantada sometimes. Especially after the people I met today, who thank god planned lunch at a bar so that a Heineken could aid my comfort level. I met a few other mate drinkers; we talked shop. We’re cool. We’re an elitist club, decrying – demonizing we-don’t-know-who yet. Well, we could be.

And then there’s how to end it though; I never know. There are also the distracting cravings I’ve been telling SOE about. I don’t have the patience. I create things without endings.

Swivel, Turn, Shoot
So Much Introspection

Ahh, the spaces. Like the space between want and need, love and lust, real and fiction. Do I trust you, do I not? Is this safe? or better, right? The space between fun and fright, anger and hardness. I’m trying to learn the difference between the two. It’s things that are never found out. Sometimes I think that fact beautiful, how so much is relative and subject to interpretation, yet sometimes that very fact breaks me. Breaks my heart, raises anxiety and frustration levels. Makes me wonder if it makes a difference, if it’s futile, if I’m trite. Will the fight for our sanity be the fight of our lives?

Working during holiday weeks is strangely lonesome – I’m staring out of a window at six national flags blowing in the breeze, attached to a high-rise building and an entirely deserted street. I was one of 5 cars on the road to work today. Strangely surreal, like the opening scene of Vanilla Sky. Everyone is home for Christmas. Emptyness can be distracting the way silence can be distracting.

Lunch today with H-town bloggers. I wonder what on earth that will be like. Probably just interesting, hearing stories and watching people talking and possibly drinking beer.

There is another space I wonder about, a space where I see the laces bursting and glowing things flickering underneath. What is the difference, or the distance, between How Do I Keep It Inside, and How Can I Keep It Inside?

Already, I actually do have moments, months, that I know were wasted time. People I wasted time over. Fear I wasted time over. Wasted. gone. Blowing in the breeze outside my window.

To lunch, my small army.

Help Westernize the Bosnian Media:
Like that’s a good thing.

**11. GENERAL: VNRS AND B-ROLL – PBS BIH (BOSNIA AND HERZEGOVINA)
We are looking for ways to improve our general daily programming. We are seeking free VNRs and b-roll of various content obtainable on Beta SP or digital format. PBS BiH is the Public Broadcasting Service of Bosnia and Herzegovina.
Need leads by 09:00 PM Etc/GMT DEC 20
>>> Contact Nihad Sladic at: nihad.sladic@rtvfbih.ba, Phone: 387-33-647-104 Fax: 387-33-655-418 URL: http://www.rtvbih.ba

Scoop

I like scoop. I like juicy and I like knowing what’s up and what’s about to come up. This will be in the Chicago Tribune next week. You can too if you email the journalist at the bottom of this query:

AUTOMOTIVE: VOLVO’S CAR FOR WOMEN – CHICAGO TRIBUNE
Volvo has created a car for women (with the help of a 100-woman design team). Features include a hood that only opens by a mechanic and an internal system that sends a message to said mechanic when maintenance is required, a ponytail slot in the headrest and machine washable seat covers. It’s still a concept car, but how can Volvo market this without offending some women? Women engineers, car buffs and marketing experts of both genders are needed for comment. Please go ahead and respond in an e-mail. I’m a freelancer who also works fulltime so it’s helpful if you just go ahead and tell me what you think. Need leads by 11:00 PM US/Eastern DEC 24
>>> Contact Amanda Long – ajtwriter@yahoo.com

Will it happen? Can it be? Is THE ROCKET coming to Houston?
C’mon deal, go down. Go down.

At first I thought there’s no way in hell that I’d post this on the blog because A: I hate being wrong, and B: if there is anything unlucky about me and this space, it cannot in anyway rub off on ROGER CLEMENS.

Oh my dear lord goodness gracious holy shit halleluia. If Roger Clemens joins fellow post-NEW YORK YANKEE Andy Pettitte and pitches for The Boys next season, I will go to every home game. I will buy weekend box seat tickets behind all the wives and have to stay in this town I’m trying to leave every damn weekend from April to September. And he’s supposed to decide THIS WEEK according to the rumor mill that is the Houston Chronicle, of whose rumor I contribute on a daily basis. Roger, I appeal to you to join the team of your favorite state. You’ll love it and we’ll love it, and it’s just good for everybody involved. Make all our dreams come true, it will. You live here already. Give in, let us throw rose petals on that arm of yours.

That’s all I’m going to say about that. That, and that my pops still has a baseball Clemens signed when he was pitching for the University of Fkkin Texas. And THAT’S it. Really.

Images from Dinamarca
Que Brillante la Vista

What the coast of Denmark looked like yesterday from my ex-flat mate’s blasted yacht….